Similitude

     I've been pondering a thought for a while now. But it's about two wonderful things, so I think it's ok for me to spend so much time considering it, for there will my heart be also. I've gone over this dozens of times in my head and I've retyped this post over and over. It is far from complete I am sure, but important nonetheless.


     I am thankful in so many ways for the relationship that I truly feel the Lord has given me. I think one of the most important things though, is that it has taught me more about Him.

     I told TA the other day the other day about a sermon I've probably mentioned before. Bro Sam Bryant preached it at Cool Springs about David and Goliath, "Focus on God when facing the giants in your life." He said that when we see a big problem looming on the horizon we shouldn't get scared, we should get excited! We know God is going to get us through whatever lies ahead, so we should look forward to seeing his mercy and grace and power demonstrated in an undoubtedly awesome way. I don't know how many times I've had to just stand there and laugh to myself because I prayed that some problem be fixed and then it was, but in a way that I never would have thought of - Him showing me, "See, I can do so much more than you can think or ask."
     And I told TA that, though it's not something I'm proud of, I frequently underestimate him too. He was off one Monday and planned on coming to Fayetteville and surprising me after class, and I never would have suspected it. Just little things like that. It's the measures that might seem small at first, but their simplicity belies the depth of devotion that they represent.
     I heard someone say one time that you should think of it this way: God didn't just bring us up to heaven, we were far lower than that. He brought us out of hell and then up, double the distance. The sacrifice is beyond anything I can comprehend. All I can know is that he loved me enough to do a whole lot, and I see that in TA. He would go double the distance too.


     He knows me. We were riding down the road the other day and he could tell what I was thinking just by the look on my face. This is very important to me because it shows that he cares enough to pay attention and learn things. God knows us better than anybody. He knows what goes on in our heart of hearts and looks at our intentions as well as actions. Because we're important to him.

    God knows each and every one of our faults and failings too though. I am ashamed at how self-centered I am, and though hopefully not everybody knows this, Ta does. He has seen me when I'm ugly with the vileness of sin, and he has gently picked me up and straightened me out. Both know I am imperfect, but choose to love me anyway.

    Another thing that's a similarity I could do without: I should do better in my relationships with each of them. We don't talk enough. I don't spend enough time just being with them. I lie awake at night thinking about them and wishing I'd done better that day. I should spend more time thinking about what is pleasing to them and then acting on it.







*As an update to this post.

   I look forward to the day we get married both because it's the start of getting to live the rest of my life with him and because of what it represents. I will have a husband. I'm excited about the experience of being married because I think it will help me to learn more about being married to my Lord as a member of his bride. On that day I feel like I will get to be closer to both of them, and that's terribly exciting.