The strangest thing I can think of off the top of my head is time. I think it's so weird to look back on something you did not too long ago and remember what it felt like in that particular moment to be alive in that particular situation. It's almost like you leave a little piece of yourself in every moment and when you remember things you're going back to visit ghosts.
But enough of that existential mumbo jumbo.
Another thing that has recently come up that I think is worth a few characters on the digital equivalent of a diary you leave out in the open secretly hoping somebody will read it because you have the underlying desire to feel interesting and included and are incapable of divulging your thoughts to an actual person so you have to do it in a passive method...(no, no psychology gobbledygook here at all...)(I'm just a tad impressed by my knowledge of synonyms for nonsensical jargon)
Anyway...
Time is a fickle creature. It doesn't like you to think you can control it.
Which is where faith comes in to play yet again.
It's kind of funny how much peace we can find when our plans go down the drain. The future is actually one of the few things I don't worry about too much because I know that it'll all be okay eventually. I have faith. It gets tested, but that just gives you a really great feeling when you come out stronger than you were before (kind of like how I imagine exercise must be for other people).
Whatever happens, God is with you. He will take care of you. There are so many wonderful reminders of faith in scripture and in song. His eye is on the sparrow, and I know he cares for me.
Even if ye have to suffer an infirmity for thirty and eight years, it doesn't mean that relief will never come. Hold out hope, have faith. Even if it doesn't happen like you were planning, and who are we to plan anyway, The Lord will provide.
Oh ye of little faith, stay strong just a little longer.
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